I do not know why I continue to transcribe my knowledge. There is little use in doing so, for what can I hope to accomplish by preserving this? Nevertheless, I continue, spending countless hours writing down things that have been long lost. Perhaps they were lost for a reason, and should remain lost. Listen to my, I should not be questioning these things. I have already lost my objectivity and identity, what will I become if I start to question and lose this? This knowledge I possess is who I am, what I was created for. If I give this up, I give up the last remaining piece of who and what I am, and I am not prepared for that. But even so, as I write these words I constantly question them. Why do my kind bother preserving knowledge that so obviously was not meant to last? Is there a purpose to knowing these things?
But still I keep writing. I can feel my memory begin to slip, this form is affecting me more than I had originally thought. Small details escape me at times, and I fear that the effects will only grow with time. I only hope that I am able to return to my true form before this body corrupts me too much. And so I write, hoping that someone, at least, finds these words to hold meaning.
For if not, what is the point.
I do not miss the island for what it was, but for what it offered. The constant stream of tasks and chores to be done there insured that my mind was not allowed to wander to the things I did not wish to contemplate. However, the forced idleness that I am subjected to in the labs has given me nothing but time to think.
I do not want that. I have tried to provide distractions for myself, but the limited resources available to us has proved that to be difficult. I have been reduced to making small trinkets and objects, a task that would be seen as a rather humiliating if I were back home. But I am not, nor do I possess one any longer. This state of limbo I am in, neither Majini nor human, is most distressing. I still try to cling to the ways of those who have abandoned me, a foolish course of actions, I will admit, but what else am I to do? I do not understand the changes that are coming upon me, and it is clear that most around me are too troubled with their own problems to be confronted with my own. Besides, how could I even begin to ask for help when I have no way of describing what I am going through?
I am angry, that I know for certain. I feel it growing in the pit of my stomach, threatening to overwhelm me at times. But at times I wonder if I should stop it. Perhaps my problem is that I am too complacent. However even now I cannot bring myself to lose that control that I once prided myself on. There will be a time to harness that anger, I think, but it is not that time yet.
For now I will wait. Patience has served me well so far, I can only hope that it will continue to do so in the future.
I worry, though, that my patience will not last that long. Already I can feel my anger beginning to erode, and I cannot begin to imagine what will become of me when I lose that last piece of myself.
Anonymous asked: Considering you're so energetic, you would have fallen nicely into the "electric" category. It is a shame that we were not partnered. I do have healthier ways to dispose of energy, though, should your adrenaline ever become... overwhelming. You know where to find me, charming human.
Ah, well hello there Smiles my friend! Yes, I guess I probably could have, I have gotten that comment quite a few times now. Maybe it’s just my electrifying personality that seems to make people think so. It would have been interesting if we had gotten partnered, though Chrykck is a wonderful partner and I am glad that I have been bonded with him.
Though, I must inquire what healthier means of disposing energy you are suggesting. It is not exactly the adrenaline that is overwhelming, it is a combination. I’ll find you and ask you in person, Smiles, you big fat demon.
- Dr Wong.
also i forgot he got shoes from that event?
he doesn’t wear shoes much tho WHAT SHOES!??!?
Chrykck needs a new picture for his wiki page
what should it beeeee?
No neat pictures on my phone,but happy birthday chrykck! !!!
ok the computer i have doesn’t have many good gifs on it either so here you go
I REMEMBERED THIS YEAR!